Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Love means never having to say you're sorry

What a crock. I don't claim to have all the answers, but in my marriage love means never having to worry about a DD. When we go to a place with a large craft beer selection, I drive home. When I'm just back from  research trip that involves weeks of 12 hour workdays everyday on a dry ship, Reed is the designated driver for awhile. This applies to more than just my marriage, I see it in all our good friends as well. Our friends who got married at Stone were smart enough to rent a party bus to take us all to and from Escondido, so no one had to be DD. Lots of our friends choose where they live based on being within walking distance of 30th St. Love of each other, ourselves, and the random strangers we'd be putting in harm's way makes it an easy decision.
In college there were times that the supposed designated driver partied harder than anyone, forcing someone else to sober up and take the keys. That kind of thing doesn't happen to me anymore which, as much as anything, reminds me what a great husband and caring friends I have.
My dad often quotes a scene in Star Trek IV: The One with the Whales where Spock is speaking to his dad after the crew of the Enterprise has been reprimanded for their shenanigans. Sarek says "Your associates are people of good character" and Spock replies "They are my friends." Spock is basically saying "Well duh" in Vulcan, like why would he bother with people of any other level of character. I am not ashamed to admit that high quality science fiction has influenced who I am, and I've been moving more and more to this way of thinking during my adult life. There are some people I just don't bother with, and my life is the richer for it.
Live long, prosper, and make sure your friends are worthy.

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